Wednesday, May 25, 2016
Today is my moms Birthday. But I guess I should tell you what's gone on since my last post. I shared with you her stroke, my trip home visiting her and how my siblings and I were preparing for her to return home after her rehabilitation. I was there the first 24 hours she was at home before returning to my home in Florida. The following 3 days only proved that none of us were prepared or qualified to give her the care she needed. Knocks on the door at 3am from neighbors returning her to us. Moments of her not remembering who my dad was and hiding from him, terrified. Being driven to her appointments and trying to get out of the car while it was moving. Terrible, heartbreaking, truly dangerous situations that meant we had no choice. It didn't matter how desperately we all wanted life to find any kind of resemblance of what it was like before. It would never be familiar again.
So in these past few months, she has become a resident of a care center (that my way of saying nursing home so that I don't cry)And its been awful. All of it, for all of us. She has no peace, no understanding. She tries at all times to get away and often punishes us when she sees us for what we've done. I just got off the phone with my dad before I started to write, and he said everyday he goes (6 days a week) his heart breaks a little more. And I guess mine does also. Even though I don't show it.
My grandparents, both 85 having been married 65 years now, have also moved into a nursing home and are not doing well. My mom would watch my nephew while my sister worked, so that has also changed their family dynamics. Every where you look, our lives have changed. Its sad to think back on what was once normal just 6 months ago and see how quickly life is changing all around us. But really, I guess anyone could say that these days. But as difficult as things are,my testimony is that it hasn't consumed me. The reality of life and circumstances has only made me desire the true reality of what is eternal. The more sad I am, the more hope I look to find in knowing that this world is not meant to be home to anyone who claims the inheritance of the kingdom of God. The more I see the cycle of life on the horizon, which is death, the more comfort I accept in remembering that we will all one day be together again, without sickness or fear. The moments I entertain the thoughts that one day this could be me and my daughter, the more bright and joy filled I see today for the gift and bliss it really is. That is truly the power and joy given to us through Christ, that although in this life we will have troubles, we can have peace and cleave to hope, that what he did, overcame all of this. I love life, I really do, but no one is fooling me that this here is what it was meant to be all about. I want my heart to always love the Lord and seek first the kingdom, live a life of power and adventure to the fullest, and then peace out of here to meet my God who did it all, face to face.
Speaking of adventure, lets talk about adoption. We are currently just waiting on a few minor details for our home study to be done while we fundraise. We've had about $4,000 come in so far from people giving! Yay! S
o my hope is that within the next 30-60 days were able to let the agency know we are in good enough shape financially to be considered for a match. This experience has been day and night different than before. I had so much doubt, stress, unbelief, and dread before. This time (and 3+ years later) I am confident, peaceful, full of trust and sure of Gods goodness. How amazing is that! Its from reading the word of God, choosing to restore and renew my mind and believing his words when he speaks.
This summer will be full and exciting for the Gallaway's as they have proven to be every summer. Yes it will have its moments,like this week when my child has tested every limit, and I slept on her floor all night because she was sick, or that just the thought of packing for all the travel coming up makes me want to cry, or that its 90' out and the AC in one of our vehicles isn't working, but hey, this is life and life to the fullest! Choose Joy! Choose Adventure! Set it in your heart that God is good and always with you and let no situation, circumstance, or devil rob you of that ONE truth that will change every moment of each day of your life.
Thank you for your prayers, your thoughts, your words and your giving into our lives.
All My Love