Boy or Girl?

Well, the appointment for the sonogram has been made.Tuesday  Feb 12th we will know if we are expecting a son or a daughter and be taking a sneak peek at who's to come!!! I cant wrap my brain around what to expect (that's a feeling im getting more and more familiar with) But I hope its like the day we were matched and met this girl. Peaceful,full of laughter, and easy. I like  suspense. I don't despise the unknown like im realizing many do. Because once you know something,you cant unknown it. That's how I feel right now. I am SOOO excited to finally know, but the unknown can be so romantic I think.

I have 5 days left to dream before I filll in the blanks. Today we drove to an old beach town to eat sandwhiches and go antiquing. All day long passing parks and swing sets. looking at treasures and my mind constantly saying "pink or blue? giggles or chuckles? rowdy or sweet?" I didnt mind it at all.

As it all gets closer I do realize,without a doubt I am falling in love. It has its moments of total joy and welcoming but every once in a while I am aware of the risk. Because like i said before its not final until after shes given birth,signed papers, and we leave. With everyday the risk of such a heart ache becomes greater as my heart becomes more fond of this mystery person whom I do not know. But during those thoughts that desire to steal my present joy, I stop to ask for courage. I look back at my own personal records of Gods goodness and faithfulness.I examine to see that he has no reputation of wrong leading's. I remember moments that didn't go as hoped and remember his constant comfort through those pains and him leading me back to my emotional health. (deep sigh) yes it is a great risk to take, but worth it. All great stories have risk.And I want the story of my life to be great.


 
What am I doing to prepare? well, I think I have most of what I need.Stroller,crib,bottles,formula,etc. I hope to have a baby shower soon for what I don't have. I guess mostly Ive been sleeping A LOT. Everyone keeps telling me too and I'm sure ill look back and laugh. And Ive been doing a crash course on love. Every morning I drink coffee in my amazing nursery (pictures soon) and I look around like I'm in a dream.Some days I think of what I still need,how much I already have,where the money still needed will come from and my heart will say to me "All you need, is to know love." So I pitch my bucket into the well that is the very source of love-God. and I draw from him my portion for that day. 

 Stay tuned... the adventure continues.